Friday, December 5, 2008

Who am I?

I've found myself lately really thinking about who I am as a person, an individual. It all started when I asked DH the other day why he called me "my wife" when he was talking to someone that we both know fairly well. This puzzled me, why doesn't he just say Kristi did such and such? DH's answer was that sometimes he was talking to someone that didn't know my name and it's just easier to say "my wife" rather than explain who I am and it has become a habit. I've also noticed other men that do this and want to ask them the same question but refrain. I've also gotten into the habit of introducing myself as whatever kids mom I need to be in that situation. It's irritating.

Who am I? To the world apparently I'm Joe and Vicki's daughter, Mike's wife, the kids' mom, Anita's SIL. Someone stopped me at church a few weeks ago and said to me "Hey, you're back!". No, I never left, that would be my brother's family. This is a person that has known me for years. This wasn't the first time they had made a comment about me leaving and/or coming back. Am I so forgetable? I know that I'm shy and quiet and fairly low maintenance so I'm overlooked a bit (not that I mind most of the time), and that's part of who I am but not everything.

Who am I? To me, I love being a wife and a mom and that is a major part of my life at this time. However, I'm also a person who has all sorts of interests. I love to read. I'm a beginning knitter. I love to learn stuff. I long to travel. I have a horrible temper. Christmas isn't my favorite holiday (Thanksgiving is). I have a silly sense of humor. I have crazy stuff that runs through my head almost all of the time so if you say something to me and I just get a silly smile, it's usually a stray thought that's gone through my head that I find amusing. I dream in color sometimes. I love to cook. I like Impressionist Art. I'm not one for a lot of drama, it's just too tiring. I love naps. I would love to go back to school and learn Russian and Hebrew and more about Art History. I think Russian history is fascinating. I can't do 7th grade math. I like to learn about other religions. I want to go to Italy just to look at the art and go to The Vatican. I wanted to work for a major museum before my life got a tad sidetracked.

What's the point of this? I'm saying sometimes we get lost in our roles as someone else's whatever (parent, child, wife, husband, daughter) that we lose who we are as individuals. Am I suddenly going to become some drama requiring, it's all about me type person? No, that's not who I am. I am me.

I was thinking over this post while I was knitting at lunch (it's a great destresser, as DFC says, it's cheaper than therapy) and I figured out that the people that matter in my life know who I am and that's fine with me. As for the others that don't really know me as me, just an extension of someone else, maybe eventually they'll learn who I am and I'll get to know them.

Peace and love y'all!


Anonymous said...

Ya know. Someone at church introduced himself to us a couple weeks ago and asked us how long we have been in the ward to which replied oh about 4 years now. I like you! (Jared's Mommy)

scchesleys said...

I'm glad it's not just me, but I babysat this person's kids! They should know I'm not Anita! thanks Hunters mommy

Tiff said...

Ditto! I had a man ask me if I was a visitor a few years back. I replied, "No, I've been here for over 20 years. Where have you been?". As for being confused with Anita, there is no good excuse for that!

Joe said...

I was once told that these things Mkes wife, etc were "Terms of Respect".

But, I know how you feel...I am older than you and I have been know as Essie and Richards Grandson, Leona & Bubbers son, Vicki's Husband,Kristi and Ben's Dad, Kiersten's, Jared's, Olivia's, Kelsey's & Connors papa-as you get older the "Title of Respect" just get's longer and longer.

To me you have always been the little girl that first blessed our life, with the dark eyes.

The one I watched grow up to be a beautiful mother of wonderful children.

I am proud to be called Kristi's Dad.

SCNONI said...

I ditto your dad's comments. I love finding out new things about you all the time. You're always an adventure.

Connie said...

You are totally UNFORGETTABLE...that's what you are lalalalala...yippee now I have a new song stuck in my head! Guess what, I call you My friend, Kristi :)

scchesleys said...

Thank you guys! I'm so blessed to have such good family and friends.